Kitija Ozolina · Awareness Mentor for Mothers
The Childhood Wound That's Running Your Adult Life
Something was set before you had a say. You have been living from it ever since, without knowing.
Something from when you were small is still shaping how you feel and react as an adult. You might not have a name for it yet.
This is what childhood wounds are and how they show up now.
This is not about blaming your parents. Most of what was passed to you was passed to them too. by their parents, by the generation before that. Nobody set out to wound you.
But the wound is still there. And it is still running things. That part. you get to look at.
Five wounds. See which one you recognise.
Most people carry more than one. But usually one sits deeper than the others.
The not-enough wound.
The environment said. through words, through silence, through the way love arrived and withdrew. that you needed to be more. More helpful, more quiet, more impressive, more easy. You are still trying to be more. The bar keeps moving because the bar was never really about you.
The invisible wound.
You were there, but not quite seen. Not picked. Not the one people worried about. You learned to take up less space. and to privately ache for someone to notice. You might still do this: disappear, and then feel hurt when nobody follows you.
The responsible wound.
Someone else's feelings were too big and you learned to manage them. To be the steady one. The capable one. The one who held things. You became very good at reading a room, at preventing outbursts, at being whatever the situation needed. You are still doing it. Exhausting yourself to keep things calm for everyone else.
The not-safe wound.
Something in the environment was unpredictable. Not necessarily violent. Just. you never quite knew what you were coming home to. You developed a hypervigilance. An antenna for other people's moods. You might still scan every room before you relax in it.
The unloved wound.
Not that nobody loved you. But the love felt conditional. It arrived when you were good, useful, agreeable, impressive. And when you were messy, difficult, sad, or just ordinary. the warmth reduced. You learned that you have to earn love. You might still believe it.
The wound doesn't define you. But leaving it unseen means it decides for you.
Naming it is the first thing. Not fixing it today. just letting yourself see where it has been living.
Which wound feels most familiar — the one you've been living around without naming?
With love, Kitija 🤍
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